Sunday, March 20, 2011

Jersey Fouls: Holiday Foul, FrankenNieder and sneaky profanity

Jersey Fouls is our ongoing exploration of the rules and etiquette for proper hockey jersey creation and exhibition. If you spot what you think may be a foul in your arena, email a photo to us at puckdaddyblog@yahoo.com for inclusion in future installments.

Top 'o the mornin' to ya, lads and lasses! Everyone feelin' a bit of the olde Irish spirit this mornin' after having a bit 'o the olde Irish spirit all day yesterday, at some prefab pub serving previously unfrozen Sheppard's Pie?

Via reader Camille Zubizarreta comes this image from the San Jose Sharks' St. Patrick's Day victory over the Minnesota Wild, as "St. Patty" Patrick Marleau scored the game-winning goal.

Admittedly, this is a new Jersey Foul for us: The Holiday Celebration Foul. Does doctoring up a sweater for a celebration of social harmony like St. Patrick's Day get a PASS?

Should we smile upon someone who turns an Erik Christensen jersey into a Christmas jersey around Dec. 24-25?

Or should we just be happy for Patrick Marleau, since he's gone from fans wanting to banish him like a snake from Ireland back to beloved player status in the span of two seasons?

Meanwhile, it's good to see the epicenter of Jersey Fouls on the West Coast continues to find new and inventive ways to piss away money.

Reader Jessica Williamsen sent in this "The Goal The Cup" Sharks jersey. It's a hockey sweater, not a child's scrapbook project, sir ...

And although we appreciate the symmetry, shouldn't it be two Cups, based on the art?

(Coming Up: Terrible defacing of a Canadiens jersey; the Scott Niedermayer FrankenFail; Souray and Phaneuf protest jerseys; Flyers chant FAIL; Jason Arnott strangeness; and the amazing true story of the "Sluts" jersey.)

And here ... we ... go.

As a New Jersey Devils fan, I can't even begin to formulate into words how the existence of this sweater enrages me.

First off, it's hideous, going together about as well as John MacLean and an NHL head-coaching gig. But more importantly, Scott Niedermayer's departure from the Devils wasn't exactly smiles and sunshine for Jersey fans, who then had the displeasure of seeing him win the Stanley Cup for the Anaheim Ducks.

As reader ZeeZoZose notes, the eBay auction for this jersey is north of $1,200.

No, no, a thousand times no to this Frankenjersey. Nurse, scalpel please …

This Foul was snapped by reader Marc Springston at a Montreal Canadiens' game at the Florida Panthers, which is to say at a Montreal Canadiens home game.

Yikes this is fugly. From the standpoint that all three players arrived in the same offseason for the Habs, it sorta makes sense. But they don't play on the same line all the time, and the odd placement of the name and number for Michael Cammalleri make us yearn for the simple aesthetic pleasures of the barber pole sweaters.

An Edmonton Oilers Sheldon Souray protest jersey that's pretty outstanding ... but we were even bigger fans of reader Andrew Bloomfield's short story and accompanying photo:

Saw this while in line for beer. Got a reasonable chuckle.

On a funnier note, that same game my Dads coke exploded all over him.

Thanks for your time

Our pleasure. Now get your dad some napkins.

If you've watched a game in which Brian Boucher is between the pipes, you've no doubt heard the fans chanting "BOOOOOOOSH" after a big save. And then the announcer having to say, "They're not BOOING, they're BOOSHING."

Our friend here may not be entirely up to speed on that tradition. From reader Jim DeRocker:

Philadelphia Flyers jersey foul from a game against the Devils. Putting a nickname chant on a jersey AND spelling it wrong! Double jersey foul!

We're not BOOSHING ... we're BOOING.

Reader Nick sends in this Dallas Stars Jason Arnott Foul, and it's an odd one:

Saw this tonight at the Stars vs the Wild.� I would say maybe this lady just really loves Jason Arnott... But if that was the case then
wouldn't she know that he wore neither this jersey style NOR this number while playing for the Stars?

Maybe she just wanted to always remember the player that scored the Stanley Cup clinching goal against the Stars in 2000. But wasn't he wearing 25 then? Okay this is starting to hurt my brain.

Not the most egregious foul... But a foul nonetheless.

More puzzling than anything else. Anyone have an insight here?

Once in a while, the Foul is completely obvious but the backstory is worth the spotlight. Here's reader Erik in L.A. on the Los Angeles Kings "SLUTS" jersey:

"I was manning my Video Store Old Bank DVD in Downtown Los Angeles when this customer came in having just returned from the Kings/'Nucks game. I mentioned the tough loss, and he said he was a Canucks fan and the Kings Jersey was an ironic thing. I still hadn't seen the back at this point and we talked hockey for a few minutes, and on his way out I noticed the "SLUTS" on the back. So I ran out to stop him and snap a (admittedly bad) photo and get the story.

"Turns out he really likes the word SLUTS and (I guess sluts in general) so why not put it on a jersey? The #42 is a reference to the meaning of life in "Life, the Universe and Everything." He apparently got it at the team store and they were a bit hesitant to do the stitching of the name, but he used a thick Swedish accent and said his name was Anders Sl�ts (pronounced Sloots) in order to convince them.

"I'll leave it you guys to decide it's pass/fail but I kinda like the effort of using a fake accent and the whole incongruity of it all."

It's still a Foul but damn, that's a great story.

It's a double Dion!

Two Dion Phaneuf Protest Jerseys of varying degrees of success. Craig Vatcher explains the one on the left:

Snapped this puppy in the concourse at the Saddledome during Flames vs. Yotes.� Despite�the fact that I still don't get the Flames fans' general hate-on for Dion, why would you deface your own jersey and then wear it in public?

Out of protest, sir! Meanwhile, Jason offers his take on the image on the right:

Not only did he cover Phaneuf with masking tape, but he missed that Babchuk is actually #33 - hey, where's that old Aucoin jersey at anyway?

How hard is it to create a "3" out of masking tape to appease us?

Finally ...

Cameron Kittle sends in one of the strangest, most creative Fouls we've ever published:

From the top of the balcony seats at the Bruins-Red Wings game on Friday in Boston, I caught these two Beantown boneheads wearing awful jerseys. The one on the left says HCTIB, or BITCH spelled backwards, and the one on the right is SSAKCAJ, or JACKASS spelled backwards.

I thought it'd be a good addition to the next installment of jersey fouls. I'd give these guys a huge FAIL because I understand the desire to be clever, but backward spelling is something any fourth-grader could figure out.

Yeah, but at least they didn't pretend to be Swedish at the pro shop like "Sloots."

Blackburn Rovers New Jersey Devils Orange County Blue Star Cincinnati Kings Ottowa Senators

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